Is it my will or God's will?

Everywhere I look I see God moving. I see Him moving in Toronto, Ontario, through coffee hours, food banks, and various other fellowships both within and outside of the church. I see God moving in Perrysburg, OH, where my sister and brother-in-law are in the youth ministry.

I take heart in knowing that my sister and her family, and my mother-in-law are being blessed through their dedication to spreading God's love to others. But then I start to wonder about my own dedication to the Lord. I admit that I have not been faithfullly in The Word in the last few months. Actually, I'm not quite sure when I fell out of The Word, but recently I have started reading the Bible again more faithfully.

Even so, I don't see God moving here. Let me say that better. I don't feel God moving around me. I'm positive God is moving here, but where I'm concerned, I don't feel it. I thought I did feel God moving me in one direction, but I hit a bump in the road. This could just be a mere stepping stone and not a stumbling block, then I began to wonder if it was my own desires I was feeling. Maybe it wasn't God at all.

I feel so lost. I need some guidance, but the more I delve into The Word, the more confused I am.

I guess I just want to know that I'm not alone. That this is common and I will eventually understand or know what I'm suppose to do.

Thanks for reading my ramblings.